Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
