Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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