and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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