Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
