Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
