Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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