I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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