It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
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