I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
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