Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Wingman of the year award. I made out with her gay roommate in order for you to get laid. Better have been good.
The gay roommate was probably better than her. Consider yourself lucky.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
is it fun? or sober?
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