I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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