trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize