so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
