he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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