after a month anything with tits is on the radar
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
