me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
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