She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
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i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
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