My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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