Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(314): View more from Missouri

Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.

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(314): Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy. http://tfl.nu/gwon

Replies (4) Good night (954) Bad night (2912)
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(785): View more from Kansas

a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class

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(785): a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class http://tfl.nu/uh5h

Replies (26) Good night (4655) Bad night (1009)
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(310): View more from California

I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.

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(310): I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember. http://tfl.nu/e7ka

Replies (14) Good night (3960) Bad night (1318)
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(509): View more from Washington

I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?

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(509): I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have? http://tfl.nu/03l6

Replies (23) Good night (3192) Bad night (1648)
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(778): View more from British Columbia

we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"

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(778): we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza" http://tfl.nu/yszc

Replies (11) Good night (3928) Bad night (592)
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(512): View more from Texas

We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.

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(512): We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment. http://tfl.nu/imr3

Replies (43) Good night (1755) Bad night (5597)
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(805): View more from California

My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes

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(805): My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes http://tfl.nu/ouc0

Replies (12) Good night (4883) Bad night (1087)
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(830): View more from Texas

we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient

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(830): we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient http://tfl.nu/vzth

Replies (12) Good night (1242) Bad night (3620)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry

(1-307): View more from Wyoming

I'm hurrying

(307): View more from Wyoming

Dude. She just shit herself.

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(307): Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry (1-307): I'm hurrying (307): Dude. She just shit herself. http://tfl.nu/4o8b

Replies (21) Good night (980) Bad night (4130)
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(248): View more from Michigan

I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.

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(248): I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist. http://tfl.nu/83tl

Replies (7) Good night (2779) Bad night (682)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come

(804): View more from Virginia

and you stopped teaching...why?

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(724): You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come (804): and you stopped teaching...why? http://tfl.nu/8fjo

Replies (5) Good night (2155) Bad night (742)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends

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(609): Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends http://tfl.nu/v4m8

Replies (11) Good night (613) Bad night (1507)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.

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(651): His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve. http://tfl.nu/5nws

Replies (5) Good night (786) Bad night (492)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.

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(508): Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about. http://tfl.nu/fvng

Replies (1) Good night (512) Bad night (320)
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(212): View more from New York

maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"

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(212): maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off" http://tfl.nu/iuof

Replies (0) Good night (544) Bad night (267)

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