my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
