So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
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did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
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My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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