okay pat passed out under dana's car
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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