Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
