i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Randomize
