You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
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