There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
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