He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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