Acid is not a monday night drug
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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