i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
