I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
He's a Shit stain on my heart
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
