I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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