Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
