There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
