I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
