Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Why do guys insist on chatting me up this early in the morning? I'm just like "Dude, I look like the bastard child of Einstein and a troll doll. Let me eat my Hot Pocket in peace."
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
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