i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
