Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
i dont even know how to be here
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize
