Just cropdusted the office
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Everyone says I win the strip club
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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