I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you inspire me to be a worse person
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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