So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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