Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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