Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
pop tarts are not kleenex
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
