Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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