We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
My ass is underappreciated
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
