I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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