Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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