friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
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I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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