I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
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