You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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