I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
What a fucking waste of an outfit
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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