Sponge bath it is.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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